We are expecting again, for the third time.
This is even more unplanned than the second time because the second one, at least we were just off contraception and was about to go into baby planning, but the baby happened so soon afterwards that the planning did not have time to take place.
This time, we were still on contraception, a double one at that (because I don’t trust my drug compliance and the level of potency of POP to only rely on one measure), thus becoming the 2% and the 5% statistic that failed the contraception measures respectively. So definitely no time to even try baby girl planning methods. But who are we to complain. Of course we plan, but Allah has a better one for us. And double contraception or not, a baby already written in our fate will still come against the odds, and the only thing we have to do is smile and say Alhamdulillah.
Truth be told, whether its accidental or unplanned, to me and my husband, the prospect of having another baby is awesome and exciting and have no space for grouching. It is always a blessing, a wonderful gift, a miraculous turn of event – and so we rejoiced, for the third time despite knowing it’s too late to research or try scientific methods for a girl.
Despite the Husband’s high hopes of having twins or at least a girl this third time around, I will settle with just a healthy baby that survives the whole gestation period healthily, be it another boy. Of course a girl would be the icing on the cake, but another boy will still make a great piece of cake. I wouldn’t mind adding another bodyguard to the existing troop and remain the only Queen. Plus I have known couples who have been married so long and have not had a chance to conceive successfully even once, so really, I thank Allah for giving me this wonderful opportunity again, for the third time.
Because it was unplanned and we were on contraception still, the knowledge of the third pregnancy came much later. I was late, but it was not a major cause of alarm seeing that I am always more or less late. But when I started losing appetite daily for a whole week and a half because of bloating, I started wondering if it was pregnancy because that kind of bloated feeling happened before only when I was expecting. The Husband said he suspected right away and insisted we tested. So two UPT kits were promptly bought – one, the expensive kind that can be done at any time of the day, the other only during mornings when the levels of hCG is at its highest. I was so curious I had one done immediately in the evening. Double line, though the second line was very faint. A very weak positive. Of course a weak positive result, though in all probability would end meaning positive anyway, is not cool. Its like 80% there but we need another confirmation before the squealing and jumping, so we waited in trepidation for the next morning to arrive. Husband was on all fours on the bed waiting for me to get up the next morning for Fajr and ushered me straight into the toilet once I sat up. The box says it takes up to 3 minutes for a result. It took less than a minute for ours, double line so prominent and dark it was no doubt a positive. So we rejoiced with the hugging and smiling and a skip in our steps throughout the day.
Turned out I was 7weeks plus then because when we finally have the ultrasound done 2 weeks later thinking we would have been 8 weeks along we were actually already 9 weeks 1 day old. And the little bean is already kicking and tumbling inside. However, Hubby was frustrated during the scan because he was too busy handling the two boys from turning the doctors room upside down that by the time he managed to keep them together, the doctor was done with the US and he missed seeing that first heartbeat and kicks on the screen. I tried to pacify him because after all we wanted the boys in together since we wanted them to share in the awesome moment, but we should have anticipated chaos to ensue. I mean they’re two active boys. Chaos is a constant. So Hubby decided, the next check up will be just me and him. No other chaos.
As of now, thankfully, my nausea though present on and off in the evenings, is not a constant daily occurrence. Some days I am fine with appetite so good I went up for desserts even. But on days its there, and my appetite a sorry state, I can still manage a few mouthful without wanting to puke too much. Not a single vomiting episode thus far, Alhamdulillah. If I thought the super mild symptoms when we were conceiving Aidil was a lot of reprieve from when we had Adam, this time is so much easier it might as well be a breeze.
Well not really, REALLY a breeze, because battling nausea can be a horribly distressing feeling. It makes you want to just lie down, do nothing and limit movements (even head turnings) to a bare minimum and not talk or eat much if at all, while sweats break all over your body enduring the urge to just throw everything up. In the midst of enduring it you are often left questioning if it would be better to just give in to the feeling and just puke. But I am such a coward, or maybe a big endurer. I put up with the feeling until it subsides, and for me, nothing helps it subside better than nibbling on a few pieces of Hup Seng cream cracker biscuits. Though not 100%, they work like magic at least 90% of the time, and for that I am grateful enough. And the fact that these enduring episodes have intervals in between is just a bonus.
Best part? No puke trigger smells either. I am fine with coffee and fried fish aromas. Or any other smells for that matter. Mostly because my sense of smell on the other hand, is currently a little aggrieved and compromised. That kind of sucks though. This pregnancy vasodilation woes is causing me to have pretty irritating snotty nose – and at times especially during the middle of the nights, my pregnancy rhinitis can really suck!! Because I will wake up with a nose so blocked I could not breathe or sleep. So I am usually awake for 2-4 hours trying to get comfortable and with much difficulty get back my sleep drowsiness so I can get my much needed rest as a pregnant mommy (making me a little bit more tired and sleepy by mid day the following day). I need to get some piriton supply for this.Sometimes it gets worse, because getting up and staying awake for a few hours during the night can also trigger bloating, a sure fire way to a nausea enduring episode while still having to manage the snotty nose issue so I have stashes of Hup Seng cream crackers that I daily nibble on in the middle of the nights (up to 8 pieces sometimes) just to keep it at bay. But when these two things happen together, it gets really tiring, and I will become even more sleep deprived than usual the next day.
I find I am also a bit more sensitive emotionally. A bit more quick at being jumpy and irritated over the smallest of things that normally won’t irritate me enough to whine about it. The husband probably realizes this, he gets to be at the brunt of my rantings whether or not it has anything to do with him. I am a bit more whinier than usual. At least I can blame it all to be hormonal. Haha.. what a beautiful excuse I have for being such a sour puss.
Bottom line is, my pregnancy this time is different in contrast to the previous ones, and despite the minor grievances, has had the mildest symptoms by far, and if Allah Wills it, it should end faster than the previous ones too, hopefully. We are thankful that Allah has been so generous with His blessings yet again. New baby with an easy pregnancy thus far, new awesome in-housemaid, new plans with new resolves for the year. His Love is boundless, it is impossible to be ungrateful for such wondrous gifts. Who knows, maybe we might get a new bigger car to better accommodate a growing family too.
Here’s hoping so many people out there praying for this same joy of parenting that Allah has so Graciously and time again bestowed upon us, will get to that dream soon too. In the end, the most meaningful treasures we have in this world is the children we have.
Much love everyone.